St. John Inn: Your Paradise Awaits in Cruz Bay, USVI
St. John Inn: Your Paradise Awaits in Cruz Bay, USVI
St. John Inn: Paradise Found (and Sometimes Slightly Lost) - A Brutally Honest Review
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because I'm about to spill the actual tea on the St. John Inn. "Paradise Awaits," they say. Well, let's just say paradise is a complex beast, and this Inn is… well, it's trying. After spending a week there, I've got a whole scrapbook of feelings, from blissed-out zen to mild existential dread about the sheer volume of tiny hotel soaps.
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- Keywords: St. John Inn, Cruz Bay, USVI, Hotel Review, Accessibility, Spa, Pool, Restaurants, Wi-Fi, Vacation, Caribbean, Family-Friendly, Luxury, Value, St. John Island, Things to do, Accessible Hotel
- Meta Description: Honest review of St. John Inn in Cruz Bay, USVI. Discover accessibility features, on-site dining, spa, pool, and more. Find out if this Caribbean escape lives up to the hype!
Accessibility: A Mixed Bag, Bless Their Hearts
Right, let's start with the nitty-gritty. My travel buddy uses a wheelchair, so accessibility was a HUGE priority. The website claimed to be… well, let's say "optimistic" about it. Some areas were good, like the entrance and the lobby, which thankfully had a lovely elevator (those are life savers!). But then you're in the room (see "Available in all rooms" section below), and it's a tight squeeze. It's like the architect thought about accessibility, then got bored and gave up halfway through the design. There's ramp access at the pool/restaurant area, but if you're not in a perfect spot, it can be a bit tricky. They also had some rooms designated as accessible, but always call to confirm (and reconfirm!) before you arrive. Don't just take their word for it. Bring your own extra-long cords, because not all spots were easy to use for charging.
- Rating: 3/5 (Could be better, but props for trying!)
On-site Accessible Restaurants/Lounges: The food was great actually!
The restaurant space had accessible options, and the staff were incredibly patient with adjusting things. The pool bar was fabulous, as was the poolside bar, which made a great cocktail… This one staff member, she was amazing.
Wheelchair accessible:
- Some parts of dining area and the pool area are wheel chair accessible
- Some rooms are designated as wheel chair accessible
Internet: Wi-Fi Wonderland (Mostly)
Oh, the internet. Promises, promises! "Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!" they beamed. And thankfully, it was true! Mostly. Look, Caribbean internet is a capricious beast. One minute you're streaming Netflix, the next you're staring at a buffering wheel of doom. It was generally good, though, and getting a solid signal didn't require a degree in quantum physics (unlike some places). The internet [LAN] option? I didn't use it, because, who uses LAN cables anymore? Unless you're an old man and like the old ways! The signal was strong in the public areas, too, which was a godsend when I needed a quick escape from a particularly intense round of Scrabble in my room. But really, it's there, it works, and you can upload your Instagram shots of the sunsets. (Important!)
- Rating: 4/5 (Mostly reliable, a little spotty at times, but hey, island life.)
Things to Do & Ways to Relax: From Body Scrubs to Existential Dread
Alright, this is where things get interesting. The St. John Inn attempts to be a relaxation mecca. Attempts, I said.
Spa/Sauna/Steam Room/Pool with View: The spa was… well, let's just say it was cozy. My body wrap was a definite highlight, and then I immediately ruined it but having a quick dip and not fully getting the wrap off! The poolside bar had a view of the best pool… the one that was right by it! I spent a good afternoon just chilling by the pool (swimming pool [outdoor]), watching the clouds drift, and feeling my worries melt away. The sauna? I never made it there, I was too busy enjoying the view.
Fitness Center/Gym/Foot bath: The fitness center? They have one. I'm not sure how fit the equipment actually is, but it's there. And the foot bath… well, it was the only place I got truly alone for like an hour.
Massage: This was a must-do, and it was AMAZING. The therapist worked magic on my knots. Pure bliss. A definite 5/5!
Rating: 4/5 (Spa is the best part. They really know how to pamper you. Get the massage.)
Cleanliness and Safety: Pandemic Ponderings
Okay, let's talk COVID. The St. John Inn was trying.
- Anti-viral cleaning products, Hand sanitizer, Hygiene certification, Sterilizing equipment, Daily disinfection in common areas: They had all this.
- Individually-wrapped food options, Safe dining setup: They were doing their best.
- Room sanitization opt-out available: I liked this.
- Shared stationery removed: Good.
- Staff trained in safety protocol, Staff trained in safety protocol: Yes, they were!
- Physical distancing of at least 1 meter: Sometimes.
- Cashless payment service: Easy peasy.
- Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit: Good to know they're there.
- Hot water linen and laundry washing: I assumed so.
I didn't feel unsafe, but it wasn't the sparkling, clinical perfection of, say, a hospital. It felt like they were trying, which is more than some places.
- Rating: 4/5 (Trying hard, which is appreciated!)
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: Food, Glorious Food (Mostly)
The food situation was… complex.
- Restaurants, Coffee shop, Poolside bar, Snack bar: Multiple choices!
- A la carte in restaurant, Breakfast [buffet], Buffet in restaurant, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant: Quite the selection, which was great.
- Coffee/tea in restaurant, Bottle of water: Always appreciated, especially in that heat.
- Room service [24-hour]: YES. Because sometimes you just need a burger at 3 AM.
- Happy hour: Oh, yes. Fantastic cocktails!
- Desserts in restaurant: Glorious.
- Salad in restaurant, Soup in restaurant: Reliable options.
- Alternative meal arrangement, Breakfast takeaway service: Solid, although I didn't use them often because I had breakfast in the room every morning.
Here’s where the "messy" part comes in. One night, I got a seriously dodgy plate of… something. Let’s just say I spent the next morning getting to know the bathroom. (I'm not naming names, but let’s just say it had something green, and it certainly didn't live up to the "fresh" label.) However, the next day… amazing! The International Cuisine was great, the staff were always nice, and the location right next to the pool was perfect. They made up for it. The pool bar was a delight, the snacks were on point, and the coffee was pretty good.
- Rating: 3.5/5 (Some hits, some misses, but overall, decent.) Services and Conveniences: The Little Things That Matter
This is where the St. John Inn really shone.
- Air conditioning in public area: Hallelujah!
- Concierge, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Daily housekeeping, Laundry service, Luggage storage: All the essentials. The concierge was a lifesaver when my rental car decided to die.
- Convenience store, Gift/souvenir shop: Useful.
- Currency exchange, Cash withdrawal, Invoice provided, Safety deposit boxes: Practical.
- Meeting/banquet facilities: I didn't use them, but they were there.
- Terrace: Beautiful.
- Facilities for disabled guests: As mentioned above, could be improved on.
- Food delivery: Didn't try it, but good to know it exists.
- Smoking area: Fine, if you're into that.
- Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Taxi service, Valet parking: Plenty parking!
And you know what really got me? Every morning, the housekeeping staff left fresh towels and tidied everything up. It seems like a small thing, but it makes such a difference.
- Rating: 4.5/5 (Well-equipped, efficient, and the staff were wonderful.) For the Kids:
- Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal:
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's pristine, color-coded itinerary. This is St. John, where the only schedule is the one the island dictates – and trust me, she's a diva.
Day 1: Arrival & Immediate Regret (Just Kidding… Mostly)
- Morning (7:00 AM -ish): Wake up in a cold sweat, convinced I've forgotten my passport. Locate passport in a ridiculously obvious spot, (duh) and then the real stress begins: getting to St. John. Flights are a total crapshoot, right? Pray to the travel gods for zero layovers because I swear the Miami airport makes Dante's Inferno look like a picnic.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM -ish): Finally, finally, the plane touches down in St. Thomas. Relief! But then the ferry… Ugh, the ferry. It's supposed to be scenic, but let's be real, it's a floating sardine can packed with sunburned tourists (mostly me in a few hours, probably).
- Afternoon (2:30 PM -ish): Arrive in Cruz Bay, St. John. Thank God for the water taxi. Everything is so expensive on this island, But, that view though…holy moly. Paradise found (and my wallet already weeping).
- Afternoon (3:00 PM -ish): Check into the St. John Inn. Okay, so it's not exactly the Ritz, but the balcony? The view of Cruz Bay? Chef's kiss. My room is a little…compact, maybe. Okay, tiny. And the air conditioning sounds like a dying walrus. But, you know what? I'm here. I'm on vacation. I'M ALIVE.
- Afternoon (4:00 PM -ish): Wander the streets of Cruz Bay. Okay, it's a charming little village, but it's also a tourist trap. Every shop is hawking the same t-shirts and "I Love St. John" mugs. I give in and buy a mug (shhh, don't tell anyone).
- Evening (5:30 PM -ish): Happy Hour at Woody's. Ah, Woody's. The legendary, divey bar with the strongest rum punches this side of the Caribbean. This is where the real vacation begins. I make friends with a couple from Iowa (they’re wearing matching Hawaiian shirts. Adorable and terrifying), and we watch the sunset. It's…magical. Seriously.
- Evening (7:30 PM -ish): Dinner at The Beach Bar. Right on the sand! The food is…serviceable. (Let's be brutally honest, they're not winning any Michelin stars). But the atmosphere, the waves lapping at my feet, the feeling of sand in my toes…perfection. Okay, maybe a little too much rum punch.
Day 2: Beach Bumming & Bitter Sweet Tears
- Morning (8:00 AM -ish): Wake up with a thumping headache. (Thanks, Woody's!). Decide that hair of the dog is the answer (of course, the island's answer to everything seems to be rum, with a side of island time). I drag myself out of bed and start hiking to Cinnamon Bay. This place is STUNNING.
- Morning (9:30 AM -ish): Swim in the ocean, get a little tan on my pale gringo skin. The water is so clear, I can see the fish. It is a genuine "pinch me, am I dreaming?" moment.
- Afternoon (12:00 PM -ish): Picnic lunch on Cinnamon Bay. Pack a sandwich and a bag of chips. I'm not exactly gourmet, (a good thing in a swimsuit). People-watching is a sport. A couple is arguing about something completely petty. I'm just sitting here in my perfect world.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM -ish): After a while, I decided that this is something I am going to do again. So, I drove to Trunk Bay. This place is the epitome of postcard perfection. I snorkel for about an hour. I see a sea turtle! I’m basically Ariel, I think. Then I get a little too close to a reef, and a wave smacks me in the face. I cough up half the ocean, and swear I've swallowed a jellyfish.
- Afternoon (4:00 PM -ish): Heading back to Cruz Bay, I'm exhausted but happy. I treat myself to some ice cream. I have to buy this ice cream at the exact same time I see a child drop their cone and start crying. Life is chaos. I wonder if I should offer them a bite of mine?
- Evening (6:00 PM -ish): After the ice cream, I went back to St. John Inn. I was going to check out a local place to eat but I was just too exhausted. I just sat and looked out at the water. This is the last night in paradise. Sigh.
Day 3: Farewell (Sob!)
- Morning (8:00 AM -ish): Last breakfast in St. John. I grab a coffee and a pastry at a local bakery. I want to cry.
- Morning (9:00 AM -ish): One last walk around Cruz Bay. I buy a souvenir. I walk as slow as molasses.
- Morning (10:00 AM -ish): Take one last deep breath of that clean island air. This is all going to be a memory soon. This is a bad thing.
- Morning (10:30 AM -ish): Ferry back to St. Thomas. I'm already missing the laid-back island vibe, the friendly locals and the sheer, unadulterated beauty of St. John.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM -ish): Back to the airport. The same airport that made Dante's Inferno look like a picnic.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM -ish): Goodbye St. John, I'll be back! (As soon as I can afford it).
Other Random Thoughts & Observations:
- Food: The food is overpriced, but hey, you're paying for the view. Try the conch fritters at Skinny Legs. Trust me.
- Transportation: Get a Jeep. You'll need it to navigate those hills (and the questionable road conditions). Driving on the left is a mind-f, prepare to get honked at by locals.
- People: Everyone is super friendly. "Island time" really is a thing – embrace it! Don't expect things to happen quickly. Seriously, just chill.
- Mosquitoes: Bring bug spray. You've been warned.
- Sunscreen: Slather it on, relentlessly. Don't be the lobster-red tourist.
- Price: Everything is expensive. Prepare your wallet.
- The Vibe: There's a certain magic here. A feeling of peace, of slowing down, of being truly present. It's addictive.
So, there you have it. My messy, imperfect, and utterly delightful trip to St. John. It wasn't perfect, it wasn't always glamorous, and it definitely wasn't cheap. But it was real. It was unforgettable. And I can't wait to go back (as soon as I've recovered from the credit card bill).
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St. John Inn: Your Paradise Awaits (… Maybe?) - A Messy FAQ
Alright, spill it. Is St. John Inn *actually* paradise?
Look, "paradise" is a loaded word, right? Expectations get high. And honestly? After my last trip? Yeah, St. John’s pretty damn close. The Inn itself? Well, there were moments. *Moments.* Like, waking up to the sunrise painting the sky over Cruz Bay, coffee in hand on the little balcony… pure bliss. But then there's the time the AC decided to take a vacation of its own, and… yeah, let's just say sweat angels were involved. So, paradise? With caveats. Bring a spare fan. Just in case.
What's the actual vibe like at the Inn? Is it all "Instagram Perfect" or, you know… real?
Okay, *real*. Definitely real. It's not one of those sterile, perfectly curated resorts. It's got charm, sure, but also… character. I mean, I loved the little courtyard, all bougainvillea and hammocks. But, and this is important: the hammock situation can get fiercely competitive. One morning, I swear, I saw a woman practically camping out on one, armed with a book and a fierce glare. I learned to rise early. That’s the key. Charm, yes. Perfectly polished? Nope. Sometimes that's what you want.
Rooms! Tell me about the rooms. Are they as charming as the website says?
Charming? Yup. Again, with caveats. My room was… cozy. Let's put it that way. And the "ocean view" from my room? Well, you could *technically* squint and see a sliver of water between two buildings. (They really should rethink where they put rooms on the website.) But the bed was comfy! And the shower, when it worked, had great water pressure. (You'll encounter some water pressure issues down there. It's just a fact of life.) The décor felt authentically "island," which I appreciated, even if the paint job wasn't exactly flawless. Honestly? It felt more like staying at a cool friend's house than a hotel. Which, depending on your friend, can be a good thing or a disaster. Lucky for me, it was leaning toward the good.
Location, Location, Location! Is it actually in Cruz Bay? Is it easy to get around?
Yes! Literally steps from the heart of Cruz Bay. You walk out the door and you're practically tripping over restaurants, shops, and the ferry dock. Amazing! You can ditch the car, which is HUGE. (Parking on St. John is… an adventure. A frustrating, possibly-sweaty adventure.) Everything is walkable or a short taxi ride away. I walked into town for breakfast every morning. Then, I walk back to the hotel and take a dip in the little pool, before hitting the beach. It was pure bliss, until the cat decided to join me in the pool in the afternoon, and I'm not even a cat person. That was a memory.
The Pool! Is it any good?
The pool… is cute. It's small, but perfect for a quick dip to cool off. It’s clean. And it's shaded by some lovely plants, which is nice. But (and there’s always a but, right?) it's not a sprawling, resort-style pool. It's *cozy*. And, as I mentioned, sometimes cats think it's their personal resort. So if you’re expecting to do laps? Think again. Bring a good book, and be ready to share the water with a curious feline. It's part of the charm, right?
I'm a foodie. What are the food options around the Inn?
Oh, the food! Cruz Bay is a goldmine! Literally steps away from the Inn, you have everything: casual beach shacks, proper restaurants. I'm a fish taco addict, and let me tell you, the options are plentiful and amazing! I had a conch fritter from a little place down the street that almost made me cry (in a good way). Then, I visited the bakeries in the mornings and the rum distilleries in the afternoons. It’s dangerous, really. I might have gained five pounds. But hey, vacation calories don't count, right? Right?
Is there Wi-Fi? Because, you know, gotta stay connected… (Ugh, I hate myself for saying that...)
Yes, there's Wi-Fi. It works… most of the time. It's not always lightning fast, and sometimes it fades out like a dream when you're about to finalize a purchase, but it's there. To be honest, I found myself actively *trying* to disconnect. St. John is the kind of place that makes you want to ditch your phone and just… be. (Except for when you need to Google the best happy hour specials, obviously.) Embrace the slow pace. It's good for the soul… and your data plan.
What about the staff? Are they friendly and helpful?
The staff? Honestly, they're wonderful! They're laid-back, kind, and genuinely seem to care about making your stay enjoyable. They are like the aunt or uncle you want to visit, super personable and helpful. There was one time I completely botched my rum punch making, but they fixed it with a smile. Another time, I lost my sunglasses. The staff helped me look for them, and even lent me a pair. It felt less like a hotel and more like staying with friends. That kind of warmth is priceless.
Okay, let's get real. What was the *worst* part of staying at St. John Inn? Spill the tea!
Hmm… the worst part? Okay, here's the truth. One night, (and I swear this wasn't my fault), the power went out during a torrential downpour. And the back-up generator, well, let's just say it was having a "day off." I mean full blown pitch black. No AC. Just me, listening to the rain and praying I didn't accidentally summon a giant cockroach. (Thankfully, I didn't). The experience was… memorable, to say the least. It lasted for several hours, andBangalore's BEST Hidden Gem Hotel? (Treebo Trend Kadamba Guestline Review!)
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